Ten Easy Steps to Having a Nervous Breakdown

1) The list is posted, the wait is over! Dash to the board and glance at it.

2) Barely read the names—yours isn’t there.

3) Go to the elevator. Go directly to the elevator. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.00.

4) Beat head against wall of elevator on your way to the fourth floor. Punch wall, swear at your hand for hurting.

5) Walk through the fourth floor lobby. Do your very best to avoid eye contact. In the event of eye contact, a small raise of the eyebrows is a good substitute for a friendly smile, since your face is broken.

6) Find an empty practice room at the far end of the hall. Lock the door, prop the broken piano bench against it.

7) Sink to the ground behind the piano, so no one in the hall can see you from looking in the window.

8) Listen to Sweeney Todd soundtrack. On repeat.

9) Solve Rubik’s Cube. Screw up Rubik’s Cube. Solve Rubik’s Cube. Screw up Rubik’s Cube. Solve Rubik’s Cube. Screw up Rubik’s Cube…

10) Cry. A lot.

Flipshit #1

As anyone who saw my blog before (all three of you) may have noticed, all my posts have been deleted. The reason for this is simple: it kinda sucked. I mean, there was one good entry, ("Lab Rats," which I may post later,) but otherwise it was not very amusing. So...I deleted everything.

Instead, I wish to write about something very near and dear to my heart: being a music major. It's pretty much a pain in the ass. For example, my schedule this semester:

M,W,F:
8:00--Psychology
9:00-Music Theory V
10:00-Foundations of American Education
11:00-Biology I
12:00-Lunch
1:00-Trumpet lesson/Seminar
2:00-4:00: Bio Lab
4:00-Wind Ensemble Concerto Rehearsal

T, R:

8:00-9:30-Conducting
9:30-10:30-Band Techniques
12:00-1:45-Symphonic Band
3:30-5:45-Orchestra

And that's without the extra rehearsals, hour or two of practicing, concerts to attend and play in, auditions, juries, basketball games, volleyball games, homework, conducting practice, and practicing your secondary instruments. It's not for the weak.

And to top it all off:

Elementary Ed Major: Oh, it really sucks, I have three classes today! I hate being so freakin' busy!
Music Ed Major: #$%!@$&*$%*$@#$%$*$!!!

Expect to see a lot of rants here about:
A) The Reich College of Education
B) Stupid Director(s)
C) Stupid Vocalists
D) Stupid other Ed Majors
E) The Reich College of Education

Now, keep in mind that what you see may not be a good representation of the insanity of all music majors. I have worked my ass off up to now, and consequently, this is my most slack semester ever. (Seriously, I'm done by SIX! Is that even POSSIBLE?)

Today, however, WAS good representation of this insanity. Today was (drumroll please) drum major auditions. And even though we went through *almost* everyone, we won't hear the results until TUESDAY. *Amanda falls down dead.* Thus: Flipshit #1.

So I'm going to go clean up the filthy den that is my apartment, since I have people coming over to hopefully take my mind off agonizingly going over the auditions in my mind. I will leave you with this thought for the day:

When I skip one day of practicing, I can tell,
When I skip two days, my roomates can tell,
When I skip three days, my neighbors can tell,
When I skip four days, my dog can tell.

Happy weekend!